Regret, let go of my hand

The closer I get to the shores of my beloved, I reminisce… my heart is as full as the setting sun and my tummy is as empty as the blonde sitting to the right of me – whoopsing her cookies into the sea.

I do not regret past experiences, well, maybe the one where I was seriously covered from foot to thigh bone in hungry black ants watching a basketball game in the town square; spraining my ankle cuz I was not watching the dips in the street due to taking photos of doors. Even enduring being eaten alive by Mexican Mosquitoes at Xel Ha for seven hours...naw that one sucked. Those made for peculiar memories, we’ve all got a few pushed back in our minds, these are the ones I push back but they make Isla Mujeres bittersweet.

I DO, however REGRET not following my heart on some trips and even this one – hence the metaphor and reality of "I fell". Tossed with the tide, hoping the shore holds fast to the palpitation of my soul.

I bloom here, I leave my mark here. I am a part of this latitude/longitude.

This time, the closer I get to the shores of my beloved I ache with longing, oh Isla, no regrets and I will fall only once... and when I do, I will sigh.

I don’t know about ya’ll but I’m hungry…

I love it when Newbies experience Isla’s golden sunset on her blue tresses…

The Crew is gathering their gear as the sun makes it way towards the other side of the world. I exchange cells numbers with Troy and Leslie. Kodi and Hope’s phones don’t get service here. I let them lead the way, not wanting to block their view of the dock. The dock we Islaholics love when coming, the one we loathe when leaving.

Well, ain’t this a pretty bucket of pig’s feet! The main street is not how I remembered it. The North Bound side is closed due to construction. I read about it being ‘renovated’ but this is just tragic. Rumor has it under the Current Mayor, they have less than three weeks to complete that side of the street before the New Mayor takes office. I am not getting in the middle of Isla’s politics but I have a source who knows both Mayors personally so I know the skinny.

The North Bound side of the street is dark and unappealing - businesses closed, no one hollering from an upper window to a passing car. Dust settling on my freshly sea kissed hair and fogging up my lenses. Where are the FRIENDLY honking horns?? I used to love playing "dodge the oncoming traffic" to get to the other side of the street. Now it’s sheer suicide.

Traffic is snarled, irritation is in the air. Irritation on Isla? By jove, get me to the south side of the island. Looking down the street, my best bet is to grab a cab at the taxi station. I will be taking the second or third cab towards The Shell House. Karma forbids me to get into the first cab that comes along.

Chance and Troy were looking for a family of five on a moto. Kodi told them they would see that here. And they would later in the week. Now the South Bound side of the street where we were standing, felt overcrowded, felt like (gulp) Cancun! We were trying to decide if the crew should take a cab, or have the Bicycle Man take their gear to their hotel. The Crew was under the assumption that the Bike Man would carry their luggage as well as their persons on his bike. I had to laugh. No honey, he will bike your luggage, you follow behind. Tell him where you are staying; he will just lead the way. There are five of you and one of him…odds are you can take him if need be. I think he was charging them 50 pesos total. DO IT!!! If for nothing but the experience alone.

The Crew is staying at Maria del Mar. I am staying at The Shell House. Five miles apart. Separate vacations with the promise of hooking up at The Shell on Tuesday for Bert and Wheyda’s Anniversary Party and of course the mandatory funfest at Miguel’s on St. Patrick’s Day. Kodi knows her way around Isla so her posse will be safe with her. I don’t know about ya’ll but I’m hungry. They invited me to come to their place, drop my gear and head to dinner on Hidalgo. I had to decline. I save Hidalgo for my last day. And I was to meet Raquel between 5PM and 6PM. She has plans to have dinner with friends and it is only common courtesy not to keep the Hostess waiting.

My advice to The Crew was to have their first meal with their feet in the sand, Mininos or Picus. Walk a block this way or that, eat and go to your hotel. They opted to go to their hotel first, freshen up and do Hidalgo. Good luck with that. You’re a wide eyed babe in the woods – at least don’t eat at an American Joint or anyplace that sounds American. Heeded, not taken I found out later. My love and kisses to them all and I grabbed the third cab out of the shoot (actually taxi #56) with the black and silver duct taped back seats, put my own luggage in the back seat with me and headed off to my destiny.

I am rocking in the back seat wishing the taxi to go above 40 mph. I am in no mood to chatter with the driver and he’s in no mood to be bothered with me. At least we’re reading the same book. When I entered the cab and said Shell House, he had the nerve to roll his eyes and sigh!! “Problema me lleva a Casa Carocol? “I asked him? I know a little Spanish, very little but I had been practicing for a whole week!! Eye Roller said “70 pesos, let’s go.” Well, well, well. We do read the same book.

I pulled my companion G. I. Troll (Orange hair and army gear on) out of the side pocket of my luggage and had him enjoy the ride along with me. Yes, I travel with Trolls. I never leave home without one or two in my possession. It took about ten minutes to get from the taxi station to the corner of the Navel Base where you take the coast road. Traffic to say the least. I sensed Eye Roller knew I knew where I was going and took the coast road. If he hadn’t I would have become a back seat driver no doubt. Same houses on the Airport Strip – lots of soldiers on duty tonight. I think G. I. Troll just saluted. Hello Mango Café, glad to see you’re open, teeth chattering beer place, I see the blur of the Crayon House and Casa Azul.

Familiar scents of the ocean I adore, my ears in tune to the crashing waves, eyes taking in every moving creature. Slow down man, I’m trying to savor back here! He must have read my thoughts and slowed down once we passed Colonia Guadalupena. There’s Casa Margaritaville, but wait? There’s no “o-dwa” coming from the dump! And I see they are recycling. Way to go Isla!! High Five!!

Tingling in my nether regions. I’m almost “home”. Can I shout out now? No….be dignified and wait til the cabbie leaves. I pull out 80 pesos. He grumbles, I fight my luggage out of the back seat and he asks in perfect English if I am staying here alone. “No Senor, mi Amigos come mañana.” With that he hauled ass and I hauled luggage through the coral iron gates. With a tear in my eye, and arms spread wide I hollered “HOLA MI CASA” at the top of my lungs.

Waiting for me was no one. I see the curtains at the front door blowing with the breeze. From the corner of my eye, I see Robert from Canada walking towards me from the house, Casa Marlin, next door. This is where he stays during the Canadian Winters. Robert is Italian, lives in Canada, speaks English, French and Spanish.

He is the groundskeeper for these two houses during his stay. He looks around for others only to discover I am solo this time. I embrace him, he embraces back, just like old friends. I bring him up to speed about my “travel companions” who could and couldn’t make it. House all to myself. Lucky You. Yeah, Lucky Me!!

Hola Catee!! Hola Mommie!! It’s Raquel – she was upstairs putting on her face when I arrived. She’s my mom here on the island – takes care of me, checks on me and has a bottle of tequila waiting for me each visit. God, I love her. I asked Robert if there was a place that delivers I could call. It’s been eons since I last ate and I don’t fancy heading back to town. Raquel said she has some meat marinating upstairs. Off she went after giving me the keys. Robert said he would cook for me . Just bring the tequila. Fair trade. I took my bags upstairs and thought I made it back.

I know the layout of the house and felt at ease, where I was supposed to be, where I had been daydreaming to be. Don’t worry Casa, we’re gonna get nice and chummy this week. Ten minutes later, I am knocking on Robert’s screen door – he bade me enter. Small talk and a shot of tequila he began preparing a simple meal of steak and salad.

Robert: Did you know there is no such thing as Italian Dressing?

Catz: Get Out!! (Texas thang to say!)

Robert: All that junk in something so simple. In Italy it is olive oil, good quality olive oil, a spritz of lemon juice , salt and pepper.

Catz: Bring it on baby!!

What Robert prepared for me was simply wonderful. It took me a while to eat – I talk, chew, giggle, chew and talk some more. We had a wonderful time, he on the computer playing the Stock Market, showing me some “moves” as he is a ballroom dancer. We chatted, told jokes, look up Fire Opals and Buffalo stones on the internet. We drank each other’s tequila, his was sort of sweet, mine was lemon flavored. The family dog (Chi-wa-wa) Chofi sniffs at my fingers and sits in his lap. Around 9:30 I was feeling the Sandman poking around my eyes as Robert turned in his ticket to the Sandman as well. Raquel came to say goodnight as she came in from her outing.

Thank you Robert for the wonderful meal. He said I fed you, if I cook for you it would be fancier! I love you too Robert!

I waltzed over to The Shell, locked myself in for the night, brought the bottle of tequila upstairs and unpacked. It was after midnight when I succumbed to The Sandman. . Upstairs doors open, Trolls and Bert surrounding my fancy, smancy king sized bed. The sounds of Govi on my speakers and the ocean breeze cradled my senses. I hear the wind through the peak of the Conch Shell that is my bedroom tonight. It sounds like the shells you hold to your ears to hear the ocean. That was all she wrote. Out like a rock.

I am so in tune with the sunrise here I am wide eyed before the dawn. I do not sleep long on vacation. I sleep hard and fast on vacation. I brush my teeth, set off to make a pot of coffee downstairs. Cup in hand I sit on the balcony and enjoy the makings of a beautiful day.

And this is what I find waiting for me as I return from my first Isla sunrise. Horny little boogers!

That’s Bert and Wheyda. It’s their Anniversary week and if I heard it correctly and by the look of bliss on her face, Wheyda sighed.

...dedicated to Fell...

She sighs alongside the breeze -

Yearning for the probable impossible.

Whispering to the promising blue waters.

Believe in second and third chances.

Mystery becomes a friend,

A friend becomes a mystery.

Emotions become a roller coaster,

Loneliness a bedmate

A walk to hidden treasures,

Sharing the Shell.

Tequila, my new middle name,

Cuban Reggae my new mantra.

Food for thought,

No hunger for the body.

A solo journeyman,

Set to uncork.

Bold, braced and balanced

Once again.

Foot set upon the dock,

Come what may -

Eyes closed.

She sighs...

Sunday Arrival

Should I even go there with the trip from the airport to the ferry? It's a been there done that sort of deal. I started plans with someone, then someone else and over the course of five months, ended up with no one.

I cannot be deterred from my island, my course has been set. I felt the need to be "womanly" this time around, not to gain attention but to feel like the Catz was clawing her way out of a bag.

This journey, I dare not call a vacation, is about self preservation and with the amount of tequila that was at my disposal, I am well preserved for the next thirty years. The plan was to take photos all day, sip tequila all night. To hide away in The Shell House and rediscover me. As you read on, you will find, I found that a certain blend of tequila makes one sexy (thank you Miguel) another makes one mean and the other five brands made me a sexy bombshell of a lunatic, privy to ups and downs to which I am proud to have survived. Thus the phrase, She Sighs.

My first sigh was noting that once I was dropped off at the airport at 10:00AM for a 1:50 flight (yeah, it was like that), I had left my cigarettes and lighter in my bathrobe pocket. Great. That ain't what I said but it'll do for now. Just thinking about not having nicotine coursing through my veins for the next seven hours was a STOOPID way to begin this adventure. I'm pretty, but I get pretty ugly without my friend "Nic". So I hightailed it to the first highway robbery store at the DFW airport. $4.00 for a lighter. Grrr...

Two choices. White with Don't Mess With Texas or Cowboy Blue with Dallas. Those lighters should have read, Don't mess with Catz in Dallas Texas without her cigarettes. I bought the Don't mess with Texas, fought with my lopsided red carry-on, which decided it would be difficult to begin with due to my four trolls, G.I. Troll, Mimi, Ba Lon Dee, Wheyda and Bert from Sesame Street Doll having a party of their own in the side pocket. Keep it down guys, stay still or you're staying here. I found the smoking section and inhaled with absolute pleasure three cigarettes. That would hold me until landing in Cancun. Whilst I was indulging in a cloud of smoke, I watched two young Asians pretending to smoke their Marlboro Reds. Don't waste your time on cigarettes oh, young ones of little lung power. Go fondle each other instead - may be more enjoyable than what you're doing now.

I knew my Isla Chica from last year, Kodi (Sista Sol) would be on the same flight. Coming with her would be (all Newbies) her sister Leslie and her son Chance, Kodi's childhood friend Hope, and Leslie's new beau Troy. It would be a different sort of vacation for that group. We were to meet up before boarding and were to spend Tuesday and Thursday together on the island. I didn't let Kodi know until three weeks ago that I was coming to Isla even though I knew I would return six months ago. I'm real good at keeping things quiet...when they need to be quieted!

As it turns out, while I enjoyed my $8.00 Asian Chicken Salad with six tomatoes mind you, sitting at a table for one reading The War of the Worlds by H.G. Wells, they enjoyed beers in an upstairs lounge a few yards away. After my salad which I took two hours to masticate, I took a seat by the windows to watch the planes zip to and fro and wonder what destinations were. Sitting behind me were five boys of the 18-21 age bracket. Their wide eyed, anxious looks were a dead give a way that they were headed to Spring Break in Cancun...parent-less. Have fun with that, yeah, have fun. (My son Aelias was headed to Padre Island, Texas for his first Spring Break, also parent-less. I taught him well, let's see if he loses his mind, wallet, phone, inhibitions, or all the above). One of the boys I had noted earlier had been pulled aside by the Airport Police. They were in the next aisle from me while we were getting our bags ready for screening. Why in the hell would he say loud enough for twenty folks to hear him, "Man, I hope they don't check my bag for condoms, Cocaine or Marijuana." "YOU IDIOT!!" shouted one his friends, "what did you say that for?!!!?" Well, with that commotion, it would have been negligent of the Airport Police not to search him. He was detained for two hours, found clean and told to sit down and don't move until the flight. And I had to sit right behind them. He kept carrying on, irritating me and his friends with his behavior. Thank goodness the Flight Hostesses were passing out Green Cards to be filled out. That was my cue to move. So I did, red luggage biting the back of my heels all the way. Travelling with trolls can be a nuisance at times, they party too hard and we haven't left the airport yet.

I found a spot to fill out the touristy card and saw Kodi's svelte stature meander behind a beam. I was waving to her trying to get her attention, in vain. I ended up quieting the trolls, by re-adjusted their positions in the luggage, they had been sniffing my dread lock spray. I took the road less traveled and snuck up on Kodi as she was engaging her companions with all there was to do on Isla Mujeres. I joined in with "Is that right?" I though Kodi was gonna light into me for dipping in their conversation when her eyes lit up!! Hugs all around to Kodi, Chance (15 years old now - wow how time flies), Leslie who looked a bit sleepy, it was something else, and met her boyfriend Troy, whom I liked right away with his Southern drawl and quick wit. Hope was passing in and out of consciousness. Protecting the innocent here by going no further on why two were looking sleepy... Let's just say, they needed something to calm nerves before flying.

Troy was on STAND BY and lucked out to get a seat on our flight. I'm happy about it, Troy and Leslie are swooning with passion about it. (Quiet Time).

I'm seat 30 F. They are in 31 &32 ABC. Bless the plane on the way in, shove my luggage into the overhead - poor Leslie, her bag had to be checked -thought mine was bigger, guess she didn't look like a seasoned traveler. Oh well. The next few hours, I read my H.G. Wells book while the others began enjoying libations. Just a cup of ice for me thanks.

Flying - flying - 40,000 foot speed bump - landing.

Bano please. Waiting in line - - Tinkle, tinkle,

bano conversation: oh cute shoes, Gracias and

Tinkle, Tinkle. Ahhhhhhhhhhh, that's betta!!

Gracias.Long Line, good looking Immigration Guys. I wanted to be in line 31, got line 32 with Eduardo.

Kodi and I had a $10.00 bet on who would get the RED LIGHT BAG CHECK. We broke even. It was the two people in front of our group that got checked. Good thing too. Intoxicated trolls are hard to explain. Kodi informed her group of what to expect. We are sharing a private van to the ferry. $45 US . It's always great to see your name on a billboard the size of a mouse pad. Our guide to the van was Edgar. Our van driver was Edwardo. Dealing with the second vowel by the looks of the names we've been dealing with so far...Eduardo, Edgar and Edwardo. I like the letter E don't you?

Look at 'em - taking photos of the airport parking lot. I too was a Newbie once so I just stood back and grinned. Leslie on the left, Hope in center, Kodi on the right.

Hope finally woke up and is ready for a grand time.

Kodi, Troy in center, and Chance. That's Edwardo in the background.

Catz - Troy - Leslie - Hope and Kodi in front. Glad we all got a base coat of a tan working cause the weather is gorgeous and someone is coming home burnt and it ain't gonna be me.

Our ride was very entertaining. AC not needed as it was in the mid 70’s when we arrived. Of course I jumped at the chance (not the driver) to sit up front with Edwardo – he’s from Mexico City, been in Cancun for seven years. “Izza yob!” when I asked why he came to Cancun. He gets tired of driving and walks everywhere when he’s not on duty. Luckily I knew the way and pointed out the highlights of this part of Cancun. Leslie was tickled there was a Super Wal-Mart.Chance liked the graffiti and colorful cars. Kodi was telling folks to look out the side windows cuz looking forward was sure to have you pressing your imaginary brake!! Troy was all eyes and hope was a laid back Hippie Dippie, chirping in when something BRIGHT entered her line of vision. Edwardo was talkative, a delight to the Newbies in the back.
I was looking for the blue and white tower – The Grand Dam to Isla Mujeres. I had Leslie on the lookout and she squealed when she spotted it in the distance through the streaked windshield.Only 45 minutes or less and I would be on my way to neva wanna come back land and the others were antsy for food, fun, sun and Sol’s. Coke for Chance of course.

The Crew as I have dubbed them took care of the taxi fare (sweet) and I left Edwardo with a HUGE …tip and a grin. He asked if we needed him to take us to the airport and back for another grand tip! LOL and maybe next time! Oh I was so overcome with the pull of Isla Mujeres I couldn’t stand it. So I danced instead…so did Leslie and Troy to which Chance just shook his head and took in the familiar aroma of McDonalds. Hope and Kodi went to the Bano and Cambio while we took a few shots, got our ferry tickets and had our luggage loaded on a trolley. So where was this dude when my red carry-on was misbehaving for the last 1,470 miles?
I tipped him well as our luggage sat for the 17:30 arrival. I told him there was no need for it to be pushed to the ferry as the joy is dragging forty pounds over the last hurdle.

Kodi was posing and shouting “I’M BACK BABY!!” I asked the guy in front of me if my “fumar” was irritating him – apparently so. I puffed anyway.

I saw the ferry coming as Troy and Chance came to my post with Fries and a Drink in hand.Americans to the end. Troy was amazed there wasn’t any ice in his cup – more bang for your pesos my dear. No fries for me thank you – I have Isla on my mind.

I lead us all to the TOURIST side of the cattle rope, while the locals went to their side. Chance, Hope and Leslie were curious. Locals have right of way – they sit inside most of the time.Touristas enter last, we prefer the top – gotta see that water and sunset!!

Troy asked me if we should allow the dude to take our stuff to the ferry – Not me – I keep my stuff with me – you watch they will try to take your stuff and park it for you. I’ve got too much in my bag to worry about and I prefer to stow my stuff next to my. Which is what we all did – up the stairs and plopped on the seats (we had to put them on the floor when the other dude got a bit miffed that we wanted to keep our gear close at hand).

Oh my Gawd, oh my Gawd, we’re moving!!!! Camera’s whirling, breeze fluttering the hair – I had to slow my heart rate. Isla Mujeres excites me beyond measure.

The crossing over was bliss. I closed my eyes, only for a moment and the moment’s gone (sorry)…I closed my eyes, inhaled the sea and stared at the musical waves lapping at the ferry’s base. The sunset was promising, my mind was elsewhere –tuning into the centrifugal force that is Isla. I hear you my love, momma’s coming…momma’s coming…..